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“Love is an odd thing.” Lan sounded suddenly weary.
“As odd a thing as there is.”

Lan & Nynaeve

This is about Lan's and Nynaeve's relationship; what makes it interesting and why it exists.

Nynaeve and Lan’s relationship is interesting because at first it appears quite out of character for both of them. Nynaeve is prickly and know for her temper, Lan is emotionless stone and both of them are quite determined and confident. Their relationship shows a softer side in both of them, and not only makes them easier to identify with as characters, but makes it easier for them to identify with the emotional and relationship struggles of others. Their relationship has a lot of tension and suspense, because of the opposition to it. Lan denies that their love can ever be and claims to be wedded to his private war with the shadow. He is also bonded to Moiraine as her Warder, and therefore his place is with Moiraine, wherever she leads. Nynaeve feels that she has to fight against Moiraine, and Lan’s attitudes. Later she has to fight against the death in his eyes. Nynaeve’s attraction to Lan is more than girlish fantasy; she takes her relationship with him seriously. Unlike some of the other relationships in the Wheel of Time series, Nynaeve and Lan do not defy normal conventions or traditions, nor do they struggle with cultural differences that cause mis-understandings in the same way. Neither of them are ta'veren, a person around whom the Wheel of Time weaves all surrounding life-threads, perhaps all life-threads, to form a Web of Destiny. Their romance relates not the the Pattern, not because events happen to throw them together, but because of who they really are. Lan and Nynaeve are also rather amusing, whether it be because Nynaeve is yelling at him, or doing her utmost not to...

Nynaeve grew up in a village amongst farmers, and the men she is used to would have been quite different from al’Lan Mandragoran. The men of her community, for the most part, would have been rustic and uneducated. Her own father took her the skills he would have taught a son, but he was dead by the time she was fourteen. Nynaeve was apprenticed, and then became to the village’s Wisdom, who has the same, if not more, level of authority as the Mayor, and is also traditionally in conflict with him. The Wisdom is elected by the Women’s circle, who generally are in conflict with the Village Council. From her teenage years, Nynaeve would have heard about, and then been involved in, resolving problems and conflicts within the village. This would have given her plenty of opportunity to encounter the village’s men, from those in authority to those who cause trouble. She would be familiar with their faults and their foibles. She also received a lot of criticism from people who believed her too young for such authority.
“What are we going to do about Nynaeve, al'Thor?” Congar demanded. “We can't have a Wisdom like that for Emond's Field… Nynaeve al'Meara is just too young to be Wisdom…”

Lan doesn’t question or attack her authority, he compliments her – and on her tracking ability, something a lot of men could have resented her having. Nynaeve’s experience of compliments and similar recognition of her ability would have most likely been simply flattery (Nynaeve is after all described as pretty) or related to her role as a Wisdom, and most likely based on gratitude. Since Nynaeve is known for her temper, it is unlikely that she would have tolerated or attracted much praise. However, Lan has no reason to be grateful to Nynaeve; he has little to gain by being on the good side of a village Wisdom.
“Until my father died, he took me hunting with him, and taught me what he would have taught the sons he never had.” She looked at Lan challengingly, but he only nodded with approval. “If you can follow a trail I have tried to hide, he taught you well. Few can do that, even in the Borderlands.”
It is probably one of; if not the first, honest compliment from a man Nynaeve has ever received. It is almost certainly her first encounter with being shown courtesy and receiving an acknowledgement of equality, by a man, and a man who is completely removed from her world of experience. Lan is strong, tall, and confident, and physically he “does appear to have his attractions.” (A Crown of Swords) Given this, it is not surprising that Nynaeve blushes.
Abruptly Nynaeve buried her face in her cup. She was blushing. Nynaeve never showed herself even the least bit disconcerted. Angry, yes; outraged, often; but never out of countenance. But she was certainly red-cheeked now, and trying to hide in the wine. Later on, Nynaeve notes that there was a hesitation in the way Lan said her name, a hint of an unspoken “Sedai” after it.

It is not only this politeness that shows that Lan is far removed from the type of men Nynaeve has been used to. As a Wisdom she would be familiar with men who talk – who talk too much. Lan doesn’t bluster, in fact he hardly speaks at all, and when he does, it is to the point. He shows intelligent and knowledge; he doesn’t make stupid decisions. Even just his appearance speaks of his skills, with the blade he carries that is part of him. He is alert, strong and capable, able to defend himself or others, and his actions prove this, saving Moiraine and their companions on more than one occasion. Nynaeve finds herself accepting his abilities, and feeling confident in them. It was not until he glanced at her that she realized how much assurance there had been in her that he could march into the middle of two hundred men and come back with the boy. Well, he is a warder. Some of the stories must be true.

It is because of this that Nynaeve not only trusts him, but finds herself in competition with him. Both of them are not completely at ease, although they respect, the other’s tracking and woodcraft abilities. The idea was to be quiet, and she was not in any kind of competition with the Warder. Oh, no? Competing with Lan – being in conflict with him is something that Nynaeve as a village Wisdom can understand.
She’s irritated by him, as well. “Lan would be better by himself - a Warder should be able to handle what was needed, she told herself hastily, feeling a sudden flush; no other reason - but one meant the other. And yet, Lan made her even more furious than Moiraine. She could not understand how he managed to get under her skin so easily.”

While Lan gets under Nynaeve’s skin, she does the same for him. Nynaeve is young, and pretty, but despite that she has in many ways knowledge beyond her years. That she was given such a post of authority says that, but she is still also young. Nynaeve is fiercely independent, and has courage to the point of fearlessness. She does not allow others to push her around, nor over-awe her, and she faces things on her feet. She is unnerved by the news that she has the ability to become an Aes Sedai, but she still continues to fight Moiraine and doesn’t give in. For that matter, she doesn’t allow herself to be phased by the world very different to the Two Rivers she finds herself in. Nynaeve is honest, and open. She says what she thinks, and is not afraid to do so. She might be bossy, but she doesn’t try to subtly manipulate people around her. She wants rescue those she feels are her responsibility. She is strongly loyal, and has a strong sense of duty when it comes to the Emond’s Fielders, and that loyalty doesn’t waver. When asked if she is prepared to take a chance to help one of her, her answer is “To help an Emond’s Fielder? Of course!” It is not only her loyalty that influences her, but her sense of responsibility. She was their Wisdom, and she feels that she has a responsibility towards them. It is this loyalty that means she is able to leave the Lan she meets during her Accepted test.
I could stay here. With Lan... Egwene is alone in the White Tower. Rand will channel the Power and go mad. And what of Mat and Perrin? Can they take back any shred of their lives? These are traits that Lan, who believes that “duty [is] a mountain, death a feather” can identify with. Lan holds to Malkier traditions even though Malkier has been consumed by the Blight when he was an infant. Neither of them forget the place where they came from. Nynaeve has talents that Lan can also identify with – namely, her tracking ability. It is something that sets her apart from other women Lan has met.

Lan comes to share her loyalties; he takes in interest in the others from Emond’s Field because of her fierce loyalty towards them. Later she comes to understand and share his loyalties. “Lan told me once that Malkier lives so long as one man wears the hadori in pledge that he will fight the Shadow, so long as one woman wear the ki’sain in pledge that she will send her song to fight the Shadow. I wear the ki’sain…”

Nynaeve is one of the strongest women in being able to channel saidar known to Aes Sedai. This also places Nynaeve in a world that Lan, who after twenty years as a Warder, knows “as much as a man could about saidar”, understands. Her strength means something to him. However, Nynaeve, between her block (which means she can only channel when she is angry) and her temper, is quite different from Aes Sedai that Lan has previously encountered, and even different from other women Lan has encountered.
“You...followed our trail?” Lan said, truly surprised for the first time that Rand could remember. Nynaeve surprises Lan. He rarely shows emotion, and the few occasions when he betrays emotion, it is because of Nynaeve. Lan had spun to face the tree as soon as Moiraine’s eyes moved; his sword was in his hand before she finished speaking Nynaeve’s name. Now he sheathed it again with more force than was strictly necessary. His face was almost as expressionless as ever, but Nynaeve thought there was a touch of chagrin about the set of his mouth. She felt a stab of satisfaction; the Warder had not known she was there, at least.. She doesn’t act the way he expects her to, and she probably surprises him because he finds himself attracted by her. “His eyes widened when he saw her face, and she turned her back on him to wipe tears from her cheeks.”
It is Nynaeve who pushes against Lan’s state of coldness and emotionless. “Without trying, without thinking what she was doing, that young woman had put cracks in Lan’s walls and seeded the cracks with creepers. Lan thought he was secure, imprisoned in his fortress by fate and his own wishes, but slowly, patiently, the creepers were tearing down the walls to bare the man within.” It takes Nynaeve, who Lan sees as “a remarkable woman, as beautiful as the sunrise, as fierce as a warrior…. a lioness...” to invoke emotion from the man who “could teach Aes Sedai about hiding emotions.”
It takes Nynaeve to push him to a breaking point. Under the stone planes of his face, he also has a temper. “[Lan] had an iron self-control, but he was at a breaking point now. Nynaeve was one who often let her emotions rage, yet she faced him coolly, head high and eyes serene, hands still on her green silk skirts.” It is takes Nynaeve to make him laugh. “Light, Nynaeve, you are a hawk! Light! I haven’t laughed since....”

Nynaeve is a healer, and her desire to heal can even over-rule her other emotions. “I may not like her, it is true,” Nynaeve was saying to the Warder… “but I help anyone who needs my help, whether I like them or not.” She learns that Lan “in the Blight… courts death as a suitor courts a maiden.” It not only explains Lan to her a bit more, learning that he is Lord of the Seven Towers, but most likely evokes her compassion. She manages to evoke empathy in Lan.
While Nynaeve is undoubtedly compassionate, she is also a fighter. “…before anyone else could move the Wisdom's knife had left her belt, and she was running toward the Forsaken, her small blade upraised. “The Light blind you,” she cried…” Lan is a warrior. They both don’t give up, and they look out for each other. Nynaeve doesn’t have anyone else to look out for her; she comforts others, not the other way around. It is Lan who moves from “offer[ing] a hand”, to being torn between her and Moiraine – making her promises that would require him to break promises to others; to promising to protect her. “Don’t be afraid… Don’t ever be afraid while I’m near.” .
But she wants to look after him, too. “I will take care of you, Lan Mandragoran, she promised silently. I will not let you die.”


© Lady Herenya

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